Millennium Travel PT1
Ah mother this London’s a wonderful sight
But
the people around here talk nothing but shite
At
least when I asked, here’s what I was told
These
eejits do nothing but talk through their holes
And
for all that I found there, I’d much rather be
In
a street in Bangkok, having cockroach for tea
Dedications
Dedicated
to my cat Monkey for always looking at me in that condescending,
“You
could do so much more with your life if you made an effort you lazy
human,” Kinda way.
Please
note that the episodes in this blog referring to the Asia experience
all take place at the turn of the last century,ergo, it all happened
15yrs ago. This is why there will be references to exchange rates,
prices, places that may not exist today. This is due to an ever
changing world and not, as you may believe, the ignorance and/or
stupidity of the author…Keep it in context people.
Part
1 - Road to Bangkok (like the movie, 1952, minus Bob Hope and Bing
Crosbie)
23/1/02
- Somewhere between London and Bangkok
After
very cheerfully giving the finger to the big smoke as I cruised
gracefully towards 35000ft, I sat back, adjusted my seat belt and
thought, “Right girl, this is it, the beginning of the next phase
of your life.”* Finally, after several movies that were hard to
listen to because of interference from machine and human alike, the
Intrepid Traveler** (that’s me) arrives in Bangkok.
*As
we continue through the journey that is this part of my life, this
statement will become clearer…I’ve had quite a few phases. I find
it pays to have a new life phase at least every 7-9yrs.
**Intrepid
Traveller (IT) is the non de plume I shall adopt for the duration of
this story. Please remember it stands for Intrepid Traveller and not
Information Technology, so…don’t be pretentious.
After
sitting in a taxi for 2.5 hrs, touring the city on a journey which,
incidentally, should have taken no more than 20-30 mins, traffic not
withstanding, “Well, you know how it is at this time of night, blah
blah blah.” I am beginning to believe that we, that is my
travelling companion, (more about her later), and I have managed to
acquire the only Bangkok taxi driver who has only ever viewed the
city streets from a badly drawn map. My suspicions lead
me to believe that he might in fact be an illegal cockney immigrant
from London!*
*Those
of you who have had similar taxi experiences in London will at this
moment be recalling the pigeon English of the foreign gentleman
driving the battered ford Cortina that belongs to his cousin.
So,
I’m just about to say, in the politest way possible for a woman
from Belfast who is really getting fromaged off, “Hey you, shift
your, you have no clue where you’re going, arse off that seat and
let me drive ye fecken eejit, when...we finally arrive in Sampeng. We
grab the first room we find, (which is cockroach central but sure we
can move tomorrow, let’s just get drunk for now), deposit our shiny
new back packs and head off into the oriental Sampeng night.
Intoxicated
by the sights, sounds and smells, (which, to the untrained nasal
passages, are quite frankly a bit rank and, also really quite
disgusting, on first sniff) we begin morphing into backpacker mode by
introducing ourselves to lots of people and consuming vast quantities
of the local brew (it’s called Tiger beer for a reason…it stalks
you and you are blissfully unaware of the bite until you get bitten,
which is usually when you stand up and try to walk!) This is going to
be a great trip.
N.B. So, how did these chain of events chance my life as I'd known it?
The relief and pure joy I felt at leaving London behind proved to me that I was on the right path and, had been correct in following my heart and my intuition :)
N.B. So, how did these chain of events chance my life as I'd known it?
The relief and pure joy I felt at leaving London behind proved to me that I was on the right path and, had been correct in following my heart and my intuition :)
