Millenium Travel - Pt 1

Millennium Travel PT1

Ah mother this London’s a wonderful sight

But the people around here talk nothing but shite

At least when I asked, here’s what I was told

These eejits do nothing but talk through their holes

And for all that I found there, I’d much rather be

In a street in Bangkok, having cockroach for tea

Dedications

Dedicated to my cat Monkey for always looking at me in that condescending,

“You could do so much more with your life if you made an effort you lazy human,” Kinda way.

Please note that the episodes in this blog referring to the Asia experience all take place at the turn of the last century,ergo, it all happened 15yrs ago. This is why there will be references to exchange rates, prices, places that may not exist today. This is due to an ever changing world and not, as you may believe, the ignorance and/or stupidity of the author…Keep it in context people.

Part 1 - Road to Bangkok (like the movie, 1952, minus Bob Hope and Bing Crosbie)

23/1/02 - Somewhere between London and Bangkok

After very cheerfully giving the finger to the big smoke as I cruised gracefully towards 35000ft, I sat back, adjusted my seat belt and thought, “Right girl, this is it, the beginning of the next phase of your life.”* Finally, after several movies that were hard to listen to because of interference from machine and human alike, the Intrepid Traveler** (that’s me) arrives in Bangkok.

*As we continue through the journey that is this part of my life, this statement will become clearer…I’ve had quite a few phases. I find it pays to have a new life phase at least every 7-9yrs.

**Intrepid Traveller (IT) is the non de plume I shall adopt for the duration of this story. Please remember it stands for Intrepid Traveller and not Information Technology, so…don’t be pretentious.

After sitting in a taxi for 2.5 hrs, touring the city on a journey which, incidentally, should have taken no more than 20-30 mins, traffic not withstanding, “Well, you know how it is at this time of night, blah blah blah.” I am beginning to believe that we, that is my travelling companion, (more about her later), and I have managed to acquire the only Bangkok taxi driver who has only ever viewed the city streets from a badly drawn map. My suspicions lead me to believe that he might in fact be an illegal cockney immigrant from London!*

*Those of you who have had similar taxi experiences in London will at this moment be recalling the pigeon English of the foreign gentleman driving the battered ford Cortina that belongs to his cousin.

So, I’m just about to say, in the politest way possible for a woman from Belfast who is really getting fromaged off, “Hey you, shift your, you have no clue where you’re going, arse off that seat and let me drive ye fecken eejit, when...we finally arrive in Sampeng. We grab the first room we find, (which is cockroach central but sure we can move tomorrow, let’s just get drunk for now), deposit our shiny new back packs and head off into the oriental Sampeng night.

Intoxicated by the sights, sounds and smells, (which, to the untrained nasal passages, are quite frankly a bit rank and, also really quite disgusting, on first sniff) we begin morphing into backpacker mode by introducing ourselves to lots of people and consuming vast quantities of the local brew (it’s called Tiger beer for a reason…it stalks you and you are blissfully unaware of the bite until you get bitten, which is usually when you stand up and try to walk!) This is going to be a great trip. 

N.B. So, how did these chain of events chance my life as I'd known it? 
The relief and pure joy I felt at leaving London behind proved to me that I was on the right path and, had been correct in following my heart and my intuition :)